Teacher : Use 'income' in a sentence.
Fred : I opened the door and in come the cat.
Teacher : Wrong! Try 'ransom.'
Fred : I saw a skunk and ran some distance away.
Teacher : No. Try 'handsome.'
Fred : Hand some candy to me.
Teacher : (exasperated) Your last chance is 'gruesome.'
Fred : Since last year I grew some.
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Teacher : Let's take the example of the busy ant. He is busy all the time,
works all day and every day. Then what happens?
Bright student : He gets stepped on.
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Teacher : What is usually used as a conductor of electricity?
Johnny : Why....er...
Teacher : Wire is right. Very good. Now tell me, what is the unit of
electrical power?
Johnny : The what?
Teacher : That's absolutely correct, the watt. Now class, you should all
study diligently like Johnny here.
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The teacher was taking her class on a nature hike. As they were walking
along, Bobby asked her, " Miss Hanson, do you know what has a hundred
legs, quills like a porcupine, a tail with a stinger at the end of it, six
eyes, and bright green spots?" "I've never seen such a thing, Johnny,"the
teacher replied. "Well, there's one on your collar now."
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The science teacher lecturing his class in biology said, "Now I'll show
you this frog in my pocket." He then reached into his pocket and pulled
out a chicken sandwich. He looked puzzled for a second, thought deeply,
and said, "That's funny. I distinctly remember eating my lunch."